omigosh, so I haven't been on for a month, forgive me, my computer blew up and decided to take me and my sanity with it.
so over the past month I've started taking tests. one of which was an ultrasound to tell me if maybe there was something wrong with me.
whatever they show you on Friends is a lie. The ultrasound was so much more uncomfortable than I thought it would be. Rachel and Phoebe make it look so much better. *rolls eyes* yet another thing TV has lied to me about.
First of all, an hour and a half before the ultrasound you need to empty your bladder and down 32 oz of water. it's harder than it sounds. after 24oz I wanted to puke. anyway, then you're not allowed to pee until after the ultra sound so ugh, sitting on a full bladder for most of the day? not fun! I'm telling you I needed to pee almost 10 minutes into my hour and a half! :k
anyway, so we get there and I'm INCREDIBLY uncomforable and about to burst and then they have me lie on the bed with nothing on from the waist down (ugh). Patrick sits up by my head holding my hand and readind comics as only he can do. and after I am finally allowed to empty my bladder again (which, let me tell you, so far has been the best feeling of relief I have ever experienced). We sat and talked for a little longer before the doctor came in and announced "We don't know why you're not pregnant" and left the room.
:o
what the {explitive}??
I couldn't believe that. I mean I just wanted to stand up and say, uh hello? then why aren't I pregnant?!?! *sigh* tell me SOMETHING. so I can fix it!
we still have some things to do before we go back to the doctor and my doctor has made me an appt with a OBGYN. so I'm not giving up hope yet, but it's so frustrating to hear even the doctor doesn't know.
I keep thinking of Anna and Rachel and how God closed their wombs. maybe that's why I'm not pregnant? is it a supernatural infertility?
pray for me please?
Rs.
